I am feeling better today. Went to the DR and we will begin to unravel what is wrong in a few months. He wants to give my body time to heal first.
I love kids. I love being a mom and doing all the "mom" things. Runny noses, tooth fairy, watching their face when they discover something for the first time. I love all of it. I never minded the diapers, flu, vomit, any of it. In the depths of my soul I want a house full of little kids, and when I'm old, a house full of grand kids. I so loved the thanksgiving at my grandparents house. They had 5 kids, and we all got together on that one day a year to celebrate our families together. The day was filled with such warmth and joy. Family football games where my Uncle broke his ankle one year. Watching the grown ups play poker, and my grandpa winning all the money.
I always thought I would grow old and be the gramma who had everyone at her house for holidays.