Random thoughts from a bored and spoiled housewife......................
The pictures are of my hairdresser's brand new 4 week old baby, our dog Mandy (who had $2700 knee surgery), my daughter and her bff in Haight Ashbury clothes shopping at the thrift stores, and my Dad bless his 84 yr old heart, snoozing at the family reunion.
I'm finding that I have too much free time.
I am shopping more often.
The house is extra clean
and I'm finding myself a tad lonely during the day.
There is a group that meets twice a month,
mothers of preschoolers.
They all get a "break" and hang out, make friends and chat about their little ones.
I am kinda needing a mothers of teens group. (no not alanon)
It would be nice to have some other mom's to identify with.
Maybe share a laugh, vent a frustration or a fear.
In my world, having a teen is harder than a preschooler.
I don't have to worry about her running out into traffic anymore.
I have bigger worries now. Drugs, alcohol, sex, college........
It's not a matter of whether or not she'll need to learn some lessons the hard way, it's a matter of when and to what degree.
I was stubborn and headstrong as a teen. I was invincible and knew everything.
I was convinced my mother was an overbearing jerk who only cared about appearances and what the neighbors might think. Which makes no sense to me, except that apparently poor people care just as much as rich people, but for different reasons.
I was mostly right about my mom. She still thinks that way and it does rub me the wrong way pretty often, so we have some conversations that end a little awkward/hostile and wait a few days before phoning again. I find myself lately just keeping things very light and fluffy mostly weather related topics, nothing to controversial. My mother is horrified that I support NO on prop 8 and that I think my daughter's dream date for prom is a gay boy. Yeah, and I'll spring for the limo and his tux if he needs me to. My mom is mortified. Yep. Completely freaked the hell out. My daughter attends the gay straight alliance at school and that REALLY upsets her. Just because I am teaching my daughter to be vocal about her ideas of what is right and wrong, can't mean that the secret perk is that it makes my mom freak out. My mom is a conservative baptist and belongs to a church that has embraced child molesters and shunned the victim. Oh, such a long long story. Not one to be told today. But I do get a little smile and my face lights up a little when I tell her about the no on prop 8 stuff and I can feel her tense up through the phone. I think telling her knowing how freaked out it makes her makes me a bitch, or at the least, a bad daughter. I'm not going to deny I do get some pleasure out of her discomfort with my daughter's opinions and my support of them. Sadistic? Evil? Bitch? hmmmmmmm...... If you knew our history with the "church/cult" she attends and the reference to the registered sex offender they protected, you'd understand a little "rough justice"(a quote from my favorite tv judge) now and then doesn't make me a horrible person.
I'm finding my thoughts drifting to WCS (worst case scenario).
I try to distract myself.
So I took up horseback riding lessons.
I'm leaving for Thailand in a few weeks and I am questioning my decision.
This post is a perfect example of my bitchiness and general feeling of discontent with my current situation.
I hate the term "empty nester". The next person that says it to my face gets told where to stick their nest comment.
My nest will not be empty, it's still got my husband, sister and mother in law in it.
There are days that I would trade one or all of them for a Venti Cinnamon Dolce Latte and some ibuprofen.
My blogs are boring. I feel boring. I don't want to go get a job just yet. I'm having too much fun picking her up at school.
It was homecoming tonight. She went to the game, and spent time with her friends. They won the game.
She lights up the room when she comes in buzzing about who was saying stuff about somebody and then this other guy totally hit on her and her friends Aunt works out the pharmacy we get our prescriptions and is the one I think is fabulous and sent her flowers on her bday. (Yes, I sent the pharmacy clerk flowers for her bday.) She had 20 minutes of juicy gossip and funny stories to share with us.
The fact that she comes home and WANTS to share all the details with us is huge to me.
At her age I made a point not to tell my parents anything.
She drew a cartoon chicken on the dry erase board at school today and was upset that a boy drew a penis and sac on it. Then they laughed at her for touching the penis when she got irritated and erased it.
She is still too naive to know what NOT to tell us. Like the fact that her new bff''s mom lets her daughter go to parties where kids drink and smoke pot. So I said that her friend was allowed to come over anytime and I would be checking for contraband, but she would not be spending the night there, ever. She doesn't even care about the stupid rule I made. She said our house is nicer and she'd rather sleep here. Plus, I stock all her favorite snacks, which makes slumber parties way more fun.
Ok, I'm rambling. I need to finish my cup of tea and go snuggle with my hubby.
He is leaving for 5 days to attend a forensic conference. My sister went to Oregon to see her friends new twin baby boys and I'm secretly hoping she convinces her to rename them more conventional names. What is with people and weird baby names? Suri? Apple? Ryken? Seriously. The only names that were unusual that I actually like is Harlow and Kingston. How do you politely tell someone their babies are adorable and deserve better than to be stuck with a name guaranteeing their being teased at school. Unless all new parents are going for the weirdest names possible, so they'll end up in a class full of cute kids with seriously twisted names. Even the Governor of Alaska has wacko names for her kids.
OK, before I go here's the list of weird names I will use if I ever deliver 6 babies and try to get my own reality show so I can afford their diapers.
Ivy
Fearne
Lily
River
Stone
Barq
Enjoy. It's my contribution to the ecofriendly movement. Only problem is, I can't seem to keep one incubated let alone 6. So my dream of having my own reality show will always be a dream.........................LOL I'm actually joking. I toyed with the idea of wife swap. They called after I applied, but my husband swore he wouldn't let the other mom in the house. So there went that idea!
Sorry reader. Yes, singular. You are the only one who reads my crap regularly besides me. I don't even tell my family this blog exists. If I told them, I couldn't write all the crap about them that I do. I like to vent my feelings publicly, yet in private, because no one visits my damn blog. So technically, it's like having a diary, leaving it out and no one giving a crap about reading it.
I need to focus more on food and less on my boring whiny housewife crap.
Maybe I should just delete all the previous no food blogs and start over.
My husband totally blew off my new website design. Whining about needing to focus on work, blah blah blah something......
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3 comments:
It was so good seeing you back at the colony. I know exactly what you mean about wanting a group that isn't alanon for moms of teens. Mine are 16 and nearly 14. Sounds like we have similar rules. My kids call me the warden, lovingly nicknamed by my husband.
Please don't delete posts. It's fun to look back on them and see where you were what was on your mind, and you might even catch yourself laughing once in a while.
I think you can set certain posts to private if you only want your eyes on them. My family took well to my blog. I used to feel I needed to censor myself and then I realized, I don't give a crap what they think. LOL!
It's difficult being a "stay at home" mom...I recently told my 84yo stepdad I needed to go back to work just to exercise that part of my mind and body and make new connections outside of mommydom. He said the loneliness begins again when you're old and your family has moved on. I believe this. As you said, when your child comes in and lights up the room, who can deny the importance of what you have done. You've made brilliant, wonderful people...the most important thing anyone can do in a lifetime.
I need a group for moms of twenty-somethings who don't know what they want to do with their life... Maybe we should start a support group somewhere. We can take mom's of teens and work with them right through their child's middle age... ;-)
I support prop 8, BUT only because I think marriage has to be defined in some way. I'm good with one man and one woman. If you don't define it, people are going to be marrying animals or something next. Just my HO. Anyway, I also think that partners in gay relationships should have the same benefits as partners in a marriage. So, you can see I'm not really falling in line with all the yes supporters on all fronts. That's me, a rebel until the end. lol!
I'm glad your daughter talks to you, and she lives with the rules. It makes motherhood a lot easier!
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